carl hansen on stage
FROM GUISES OF DESIRE, CHAPTER 1
Carl Hansen strode to the front of the stage. The tails of his black coat swirled as he bowed, first to the right, then to the left. The audience clapped in muted appreciation, alert to the heightening drama.
Hansen took a few steps back and raised his arm in salute to the woman behind him. Illumined in the circular glow of a red spotlight, she lay across the backs of two chairs standing a few feet apart. One supported her head, the other her ankles. Her skirts swept out an arc to the floor.
‘Ladies and gentleman, what you see before you is remarkable.’ Hansen’s gaze scanned the audience, as if challenging them to deny it. ‘But a sight even more remarkable is yet to come. If I could have just one more volunteer from the audience, please? Preferably a gentleman.’
A few hands were tentatively raised. Hansen beckoned to a portly man of middle years. ‘Yes, you sir. If you please, sir.’
The man walked up onto the stage. Hansen shook his hand. ‘Thank you, sir. This is most kind of you. Would you be good enough to tell us your name?’
‘Frankel. Fritz Frankel.’
‘Thank you, Herr Frankel. Now, before we go any further I would like you to remove your boots.’
A stage assistant scurried out from the wings with a chair for the man to sit on while he took off his boots. A second assistant produced a small set of steps which he placed at the side of the prone woman.
‘And now, sir, if you would accompany me, please.’ Hansen took the man’s elbow and walked over to the steps. ‘I would like you to climb the steps.’ The man looked at him uncertainly but did as he was bid. There was silence in the auditorium. Hansen addressed the man again.
‘Now listen, sir, my next request will surprise you, but have no fear. You are quite safe, and the lady you see lying here is also safe.’ He paused. There were faint whispers in the audience. The woman on the chair backs made not a move.
‘Are you ready, sir?’
The man nodded.
‘I would like you to place your right foot on this lady’s midriff.’
The man obeyed.
‘And now your left foot.’
The man hesitated, aghast.
‘I assure you, sir, there is nothing to fear. See here, my two assistants and I are right by your side to support you and the lady in the event of anything untoward.’
Slowly the man raised his left foot from the steps and placed it beside his right foot. He was now standing upright, high above the stage. The woman on the chairs was bearing his full weight. Her body remained straight as an arrow, the man on top of her as steady as a mason on a scaffolding plank.
‘Ladies and gentlemen!’ cried Hansen, twirling round, arms aloft.
The audience roared their applause.
Hansen took a few steps back and raised his arm in salute to the woman behind him. Illumined in the circular glow of a red spotlight, she lay across the backs of two chairs standing a few feet apart. One supported her head, the other her ankles. Her skirts swept out an arc to the floor.
‘Ladies and gentleman, what you see before you is remarkable.’ Hansen’s gaze scanned the audience, as if challenging them to deny it. ‘But a sight even more remarkable is yet to come. If I could have just one more volunteer from the audience, please? Preferably a gentleman.’
A few hands were tentatively raised. Hansen beckoned to a portly man of middle years. ‘Yes, you sir. If you please, sir.’
The man walked up onto the stage. Hansen shook his hand. ‘Thank you, sir. This is most kind of you. Would you be good enough to tell us your name?’
‘Frankel. Fritz Frankel.’
‘Thank you, Herr Frankel. Now, before we go any further I would like you to remove your boots.’
A stage assistant scurried out from the wings with a chair for the man to sit on while he took off his boots. A second assistant produced a small set of steps which he placed at the side of the prone woman.
‘And now, sir, if you would accompany me, please.’ Hansen took the man’s elbow and walked over to the steps. ‘I would like you to climb the steps.’ The man looked at him uncertainly but did as he was bid. There was silence in the auditorium. Hansen addressed the man again.
‘Now listen, sir, my next request will surprise you, but have no fear. You are quite safe, and the lady you see lying here is also safe.’ He paused. There were faint whispers in the audience. The woman on the chair backs made not a move.
‘Are you ready, sir?’
The man nodded.
‘I would like you to place your right foot on this lady’s midriff.’
The man obeyed.
‘And now your left foot.’
The man hesitated, aghast.
‘I assure you, sir, there is nothing to fear. See here, my two assistants and I are right by your side to support you and the lady in the event of anything untoward.’
Slowly the man raised his left foot from the steps and placed it beside his right foot. He was now standing upright, high above the stage. The woman on the chairs was bearing his full weight. Her body remained straight as an arrow, the man on top of her as steady as a mason on a scaffolding plank.
‘Ladies and gentlemen!’ cried Hansen, twirling round, arms aloft.
The audience roared their applause.
